Burros–Nearby Mexican Surf Spot With A Sprinkling Of Bikinis

Burros–Nearby Mexican Surf Spot With A Sprinkling Of Bikinis

We went to Burros the other day, a little surf spot not too far from La Cruz, and had a blast. It was my first time there. I can’t wait to go back. With a better camera.

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Henry in his natural habitat. Yep. The truck’s name is Henry. Thanks to Dawn and Mike on Destiny for letting us borrow the truck to go surfing.

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Flock of semi-tame propane bottles, resting gently on their perches.

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Eli modeling the newest hipster craze…facial hair that is actually just leaves. 100% organic and renewable. Plus some other popular buzzwords.

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Walking down to the beach. After they’ve moved out of sight, it occurs to me I’ve never been here before and does the path only go to one place? Because if there’s a fork in the trail, I’m screwed.

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Lovely tree with unfortunate dermatitis issue. Or sunburn. Hard to know. I don’t speak tree fluently.

I reached down to pick up a big piece of shed bark and right before my fingers made contact, a thought skittered through my mind…wonder if it’s poisonous? Then my brain gave a giant snort of laughter and told me to quit being such a dork. I mean, come on–this is Mexico, not Australia. Everything I see is not trying to kill, maim, poison, or otherwise feast upon my entrails. Which is when this caught my eye…

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WTF, Mexico? Are you trying to give Australia some competition in the “Everything I See Wants To Kill Me” category?

When my eyes zoomed a little further out, I noticed an enormous web that I almost stuck my head into. With a spider in residence that, while not Australia-worthy in any way, still had a leg span of like 3 or 4 inches. I took two pictures of it. The camera’s autofocus decided to nope all over my spider pics, and when I was scrolling through later on, all I got was blurry foliage. You know how, for instance, you’re in the bathroom trying to have a satisfying morning constitutional and then you spy a spider looking at you. Waiting. And you have to keep it in your sight at all costs? As I was flipping through the pictures, looking for my spider shots, I got increasingly anxious, for no good reason, because I couldn’t find the spider I was supposed to be keeping an eye on. Stupid brain.

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Theoretically, the point of no return. Also the place where nobody who walked by gave any fucks at all.

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It was so jungly and awesome; The explorer in me wished there were boots on my feet, instead of flip-flops.

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The 3 Pillars of Vine, sacred temple consecrated to all that is Vine. Also, a place Vine addicts will never actually see, since they can’t tear their eyes away from their phones long enough to navigate the trail.

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Not road apples. Some kind of seed pod or remnants of an alien invasion.

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Beautiful plant that wants to be in the aforementioned Australia competition. Would be great if it was like aloe, because in the process of obtaining a sample, you’d hack great holes in your hands and the aloe goo is already conveniently packaged inside. They should put little aloe packets inside those impossible to open plastic blister packs of whatever you really need in a hurry.

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Literally, needle sharp thorns that are almost as long as my thumb. Where the frack did I put that aloe?

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The one sign that everyone did give some fucks about.

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And suddenly, we were out of the jungle and onto the beach. What we didn’t know at the time is that this was a magical beach, full of attractive girls who obligingly walked back and forth in tiny bikinis. For some reason, Eli always wants to go to this beach.

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Rachel from Emerald Lady, showing off her surf moves while Nala takes advantage of shade. Steve split his time between surf lessons for Rachel and just plain surfing, while our friend Katrin (s/v Lila) was wowing the guys in the lineup :-)

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Beautiful sea urchin remnant. Fun fact: it takes almost no force whatsoever to break these off in your body while surfing. Just brush up against one and it’s instant impalement. They break off and you have to dissolve them away by soaking your feet (or wherever you got jabbed) in vinegar for just under 100 years. After surfing in Mexico for the last 3 years, Steve is about 5% sea urchin spines.

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Nala, luxuriating in the shade, enjoying her spa treatment.

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Having just discovered the cave behind him is apparently only a place for people to pee. Two steps inside and the urine smell billows up all around, wrapping you in a hot, moist cloak of disgusting.

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After observing a number of impossibly perfect bikini butts walk across this rocky patch, Eli was strangely compelled to find out exactly where they were all coming from.

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Turns out there’s a couple of resorts the next beach over and apparently, their clients are almost exclusively everything guys like to look at.

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Random shot of supercool house at the beginning of the trail. Only saw it as we came back to the truck. I am totally observant.

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